A boy and his ...,

                I fap. I admit it, with no shame. I'm the fap master, I'm his Holy Fapiness, I'm the King of FapTown and I'm addicted, but most of all I need help. 
               Last night my internets were not working right, the connection was slow and I am studying for a while now ergo my stressful nature was above all volatile. I am a single man with no female companion to soften the burden of stress that I carry so I must suffice with all that I can, mainly, my right hand. 
              I accessed a slow moving p**n site were I selected the Granny category. There I came upon a video shot in a bunker in Siberia by the Russian Mafia, the subjects of which were a 80 years old granny and her three nippled dog. I was most excited. 
              In the darkness of my room, I whipped out the hammer of meat and I grasped in firmly into my hand. The Krakken was released, a beast so powerful it could make the Earth quake if I ever was to fall while experiencing a boner. Oh yes, it's that deadly. 
             Upon seeing the nakedness of the granny and the mounting of the dog, my friend below was awakened from it's slumber, and it quickly rose towards the sky, and I could barely tame the beast but with patience it was succumbed by my delicate fingers. The fapping had begun. 
              My hand began to move in harmony with the wild aberration and somewhere in an underdeveloped third'country a tornado had emerged, in Japan another tsunami struck and in Pengo-Pengo the entire population was annihilated by sound waves I produced. 
            Reaching the end of the video, and with the loud noises produced by the senile woman while under the dog, the process of deliberation came to an end. The climax was exuberant. I forced the mighty Anaconda into its lair and whilst doing so I turned around only to see a figure watching me. Someone was overlooking me, during the entire process. I was embarrassed.
             I cannot fight this vice, this unnatural and utterly heinous behavior but I must for it has overtaken my life since I was a little child. I used to fap in the comfort of my bathroom at school, when I went to church to confess my sins, while in the theatre watching my favorite movie, while sleeping. I fap while I talk to my dearest of friends (among which Emptysmile) and I need professional help. 
            If there is someone out there that could help me with my predicament please I beg of you, assist me. 
.............................................
Post Scriptum : I wrote this post with one hand ;)